If I am honest, I have ended the year feeling a little flat, completely burned out from a manic November and December. Too much running around, trying to do everything and doing nothing very well. I also feel like I’ve failed the kids a bit, I’ve been on the impatient side, not able to turn off and relax, and haven’t given them the quality time with me they should have had. This year I will be putting the kids first more…a prime example was the Christmas Fair at school, I wasn’t meant to be helping, I was meant to be making sure the stalls had enough change, I thought that would mean I could walk around with the girls, let them play the games while I did my job, only someone didn’t turn up to help, so I went on a stall, the girls “helped” which meant they basically begged me for 2 hours to look around….at the end I realised we hadn’t even seen half the games…they hadn’t had a good time…and my whole reason for helping was to help them, but I hadn’t..my helping and being a very active PTA member actually made their experience of the fair worse, which isn’t really how it should be. If Rob had been there it would’ve been a different story, he could’ve had the girls and my helping wouldn’t have impacted them, but Zak had a party, which I didn’t want him to miss out on, another example of me not knowing my limits, not knowing when to say “no”, trying to make everyone happy and not succeeding.
I definitely need to streamline our lives a bit this year, cut out the things we don’t need to be doing and allow for chilled out time rather than constantly dashing from one place to another, which is not an easy task when you have one child in a gymnastics squad, one in a swim squad and another who also needs to be given those opportunities. I am hoping the key to a more relaxed life is organisation, if only I could have ballet clothes out ready rather then scrabbling around crossly 5 minutes before the class starts for example. I also need to prioritise my own work, set aside time and focus in the school day then after school is just family time.
It’s not easy trying to juggle everything, keeping up with three children’s social lives, trying to make sure no one misses out on anything, I probably need to cut myself a bit of slack, mostly I do manage ok, but I definitely feel stressed out at least 50% of the time and spent the first half of the year plagued by crippling tension headaches. This year I am going to try and look after myself better, and go snowboarding, and take us on lots of adventures….because when I took the time to look back on 2015 it was pretty adventure filled and did make me realise that the kids don’t feel the stress or the pressure we do, they just make the most of the opportunities that arise, so I’ll also be trying to create more opportunities for us, which probably doesn’t fit so well with me doing less, but we shall see.
Happy New Year Everyone…I hope 2016 is a great one for all of us.
It is so hard juggling everything and trying to keep everyone happy isn’t it? I think you are doing a great job, and yes, cut yourself some slack!!
Sarah MumofThree World
I can relate to so much of this – kids needing to be in different places at the same time, wanting to give them the best opportunities, wanting to do the best for them, but not sure whether you really are…
Here’s hoping you can find a more chilled-out balance for yourself and the family in 2016.
Stephs Two Girls
Can understand all of this – I only have two and it’s difficult enough! Plenty of tension headaches and stress here too though. I have made a point of saying no more last year, and it actually feels good once you get used to it 🙂 Good Luck with 2016! x
I hope you manage to find your balance this year. We stopped “helping” when the kids were about 7, when we realised that it was to the detriment of OUR family.
Its hard to say no when you feel you need to help everyone in need but I guess you need to prioritise and put family first. I hope you get to spend more time with your kids this year.
At least you recognise that something needs to give a little. It is really hard and by acknowledging it – you can change things.
Give yourself a break sometimes. While you torture yourself, thinking you’re not doing a good enough job for your children, they are safe and healthy, and most likely happy enough. I’m sure they love and appreciate you for everything you do for them.
I have a similar life Em and my lack of organisation causes me huge stress. I am determind to make sure clothes and stuff for each dasy are totally sorted night before and house decluttered and plans in place this year so i am less stressed and corss. Good look to you xxxx
I totally get this and this is why I have started my slowly lived project. I hope you have a great 2016
Boo Roo and Tigger Too
I’m sorry to hear that you have been feeling overwhelmed, I think we are all guilty of taking on too much and could do with some streamlining. Her’s hoping that the New Year will ease your load and you will be able to relax and enjoy things again
I have left the PFA for that very reason – it just impacted too much on my time with the kids and events just were not fun. Hope you find the time to relax more this year xx
It really is hard to find that balance isn’t it?
I struggle sometimes trying to fit everything in but I think I’m getting there now. Kind of.
I have a hard enough time managing all the clubs with just 2 children, so I take my hat off to you! You’re right, kids don’t feel the stresses in the same way we do. Roll on an adventure-filled 2016 for us all!
I so know that feeling of needing to streamline! I hope you get a better balance going forward and have a great 2016!
It is really hard juggling everything isn’t it? As a single mum of four. I hear you! I actually crashed and burned last weekend – floored by stress, so am re-evaluating many things right now. I hope you have a great 2016. Kaz x
I’ve been feeling exactly like this too Emma , in fact I could have written it about me. My New Years resolution was to be more organised! I think I am realising though that life with three is hectic and juggling it all is exhausting no matter how organised you are. I do leave ballet clothes out ready but its still stressful having to drag the other two to watch, keep them busy week in week out and extra ballet lessons because they want to do exams etc.
I also did the Christmas fair and like you didn’t manage to cover the stalls properly or see enough of the fair. It was a nightmare and we had more fun snuggled up on sofa together with the hot chocolate and mini marshmallows along with some other treats we brought there.
Its a cake sale tonight and I can see another nightmare evening coming, juggling all 3 and selling cakes, watching what Daisy snaffles as she has an egg allergy and making sure she doesn’t run off…i’m exhausted already! I can picture my husband saying “if its all too much just don’t do it” but I feel I should.
Lets hope 2016 is a better year for both of us with less stress and more fun with out families xx
obviously that meant to say with our families x