It’s been a weird couple of weeks, I’ve been feeling quite sad that my littlest is now half way through Year R and a little unsure about what to do with myself, which is odd because every second of every day is completely full, it’s not that I’m bored, it’s more a restlessness, an unsettled what do I do now feeling…last Monday I spent the day in school with Hannah in Year R, it was a lovely insight into her school life, but again I came away a little sad. I didn’t make the most of Zak’s infant school life, I wished it away, always counting down to the next holiday, but now I want to relish every happy second of the girls’ time there. I know that too soon their days of junk modelling and making dens will be over, replaced with homework, projects and musical instruments.
I have a plan, of sorts, I am ready to take Science Sparks to the next level, I might look at working in a school, maybe get an education qualification. I’m just all of sudden overwhelmed at the though of life whizzing by without me realising.
The result of my unsettledness is a lack of my usual style of photo, to be honest I just haven’t been able to summon up much enthusiasm for taking my camera out, but I have been paying more attention to the little things, taking the time to really listen the children, spending less time on the computer. Little H has spent most of the week writing, she’s getting so good and I’m so proud of her. She wrote this for her big sister, a real heart melting moment.
x
This resonates with me so much. I’ve really been realising recently that when I take time to listen properly the kids are so much better behaved. They are probably so used to trying to drag my attention away from my phone \ computer – it’s terrible. But I am conscious of those years slipping through my fingers now.
I’m SO with you. It’s going so fast and it feels like there are so many outside influences taking my time away from my kids. I really try to get things done before the afternoon pick up but it’s not always possible x *tries to push pause on life
I am so guilty of only half listening to the kids while googling something on my phone or kindle. I need to try and listen properly more. I am hoping to carve out half a day a week, when they are at nursery, and try to get most of my writing for the week done and scheduled so that I can actually be present when they are around, if that makes sense. That is the plan….who knows what the reality will be.
I love the photo, a wonderful sibling moment that you can look back on when they’re being less friendly towards each other. Also your words really struck a chord with me. I too have been guilty of not giving my daughter my full attention. There’s always something else going on that seems to be more important but in reality they aren’t, or at the very least they can wait, whereas Bubs will only be this age for a little while.
Guilty! I can’t even count how often I tell Amy to wait a minute because I’m busy doing something that really isn’t that important. It’s not easy to shake off a habit though…
Totally relate to feeling a bit restless at the moment, wanting to do something more but not knowing what *argh*
Ohh best of luck with your plans Emma to take Science Sparks to the next level, how very exciting. Mich x
Good Emma, I’m glad you have realised this as being a mum to two older children now in their 20’s I can honestly say the time flew by in a whirl.
That is why I have taken measures to make changes whilst mothering the twins. I am not perfect, I could always do more but I am consciously trying to make the most of every day with them.
Hi Emma
It feels like you are at a muddle time but dont despair lovely i think these come when we are just figuring which path to take next. You’ll get there my clever lovely reflective friend. bx